how long will you wait for me

tesuka-chan entered her weird world on [Monday, October 27, 2003]

It's my birthday today.
Whee. Yay. What fun.

So what happened in this EXCITING day? Nothing much really... school, greetings, dinner out. Yep. Very exciting. The only real fun part was when the waiters in the restaurant sang "happy birthday" to me. The free dessert wasn't really good though. *sigh* I am a hopeless pessimist when it comes to these kinds of things.

I don't know... for a long time now, I've always wanted to be 17. For me, it's an exciting age, full of wonders and adventures - because most of the characters of the books I've read were around this age. Alas, it is not so in reality. If you call projects, over-stuffed eating, and more projects an adventure, then so be it. But I don't really think so... it is just a sad illusion that I have created in my mind. Oh well. There is the other 394 days left of being 17... I suppose I should wait and feel how it is like before I judge it. (Now I'm looking forward to 18, when I can FINALLY watch R18 movies and go clubbing. Freedom comes at 18.)

Now don't get me wrong; I am excited about something - my party. That is to say, Ja, Karen and my party. 'Tis a costume party to boot! It has decorations, bands and everything... too bad drinks aren't really allowed. (That doesn't really stop me though ;p) We've been preparing for it for a month and I really want it to go well this thursday. *crosses figners* I totally hope it would be fun! And after that... a whole week retreat in Baguio! Now that's a celebration! ^_^

Oh well. I just hope SOMETHING happens to me this year. Something exciting... an adventure of a lifetime. I wouldn't want to regret being mediocre *cough cough*. That's really my wish. ^_^

tesuka-chan entered her weird world on [Sunday, October 5, 2003]

I was ransomed for 6 bucks.

Well, that's just a bit of exaggeration, as usual. Actually, I was craving for ice cream so I dragged my sister to BTC. I bought pistacio on a waffle cone -- 56 bucks. Thing is, I only had 50 with me and my sister didn't bring any money. So she had to go to mom while I wait there, the evil waitress from hell raising her eyebrow up a few notches. I just sat there, innocently licking my green ice cream, waiting to be ransomed for 6 bucks. Right. Good fun.

Oh yeah, took my UA&P entrance test today. It was the most difficult so far... but the place makes up for it. White marble everywhere, with three elevators for one building. It looks better than a 5- star hotel. Small place, but VERY nice. The test, on the other hand, was not as pretty as the campus. There was actually a listening skills part! *looks agog* Weird. And the essay... yeesh. Math was horrible... worst than that of Ateneo. English, so-so. Well, it wasn't so bad... I was sitting on a cushioned seat inside an airconditioned hall. Nice.

Damn. Gotta make my notecards for research paper. Toodles. *makes little wavy motions with fingers*

tesuka-chan entered her weird world on [Monday, September 29, 2003]

Here's one of the promised poems that I wrote. Well, 'tis more of a song actually. (Figured out the tune and all in my head... ended up sounding like one of Tori Amos's songs ^_^)

Too Late

Death is inevitable, that much is true
Life is short, it's nothing new
Tears dry up, and all I do
Is devote my life in finding you

My heart longs to have that feeling,
"Love". I do not know how I'm dealing
All I know is my head is reeling
Seeing, looking, endlessly searching

You. I know you're here out of my sight
Out of my grasp, beyond what is right
I tried but I fell deep into the night
I never saw the ray of light

All empty, all hollow, aching inside
The void leaves nothing for me to hide
Hopeless - you stand by the door and decide
And you sweep me up along with the tide

Happiness, high and above
I finally found you
But... it's too late -
I am lost
You came too late.

One last kiss, oh, one last sigh
Something to help remember you by
So that when I'm already up in the sky
At least I know that I've said goodbye.

The first, the last kiss goodbye.

Well, just to let you know, (as if it wasn't obvious enough already) I wrote this in one of my sawi moments. I'm such a hopeless case.

tesuka-chan entered her weird world on [Wednesday, September 24, 2003]

I am totally freaked out and pranoid right now. Reason: out of sheer curiosity, I googled myself. That's right... GOOGLED myself. No, that doesn't have anything to do with naughty acts (you evil, horny people). It simply meant that I typed "tesuka- chan" at the search engine thing.

There were LOTS of results.
Along with some stuff about the great Osamu Tezuka. How creepy. I mean, ANYONE can just type my name and get those results!!! And one of them leads to my BLOG!!! *totally panicked and paranoid* I shall change my name! I shall destroy google! I shall -

Oh wait. Crap. Nevermind.
Indifference is the key.
Harrruuuummmmm....

tesuka-chan entered her weird world on [Tuesday, September 23, 2003]

Everything's JUST fine and dandy.

I've got two pissed off male teachers, unexceptional grades, a research paper, no computer, and a depressed predicament. *sigh* The fad today is 'depression' and 'self- pity'. Victo Hugo should've written about a STUDENT like ME in Les Miserables. *sigh*

I stink. I'll take a shower now.

tesuka-chan entered her weird world on [Sunday, September 21, 2003]

Crap. I'm making a blotch out of this "make a website" thing... I don't know anything! *bawls* I'm trying my best, I really am! I'm just scared of making a mistake and ruin everything Chill did for me! *sniff* Well, at least i'm sort of making progress with the archive thingymajigg. Right. I'd rather write, thank you very much!